Travel costs calculated down to a grain of salt

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I’ve always been lucky when it comes to air travel.

My bags have never ended up in Miami when I was headed somewhere else, nor have I had to experience an emergency landing in Fargo, N.D.

There have been delays in Atlanta and turbulence over Chicago. Cramped space and smelly passengers.

A few years back I lost my breakfast during an approach to LaGuardia Airport in New York City, but Dramamine and Ginger Ale seems to have taken care of that problem on recent trips.

While I’ve never really enjoyed flying, no experience has been so terrible as to steer me away from it.

My luck turned last week on a return trip to Las Vegas from New York’s John F. Kennedy Airport with my fiancée.

Everything had been going smoothly until we were set to taxi to the runway. Our captain came on the speaker and announced air traffic heading west would have to wait to take off because of an approaching storm, which was, at the time, more than three hours away.

And so we waited.

Every 30 minutes or so the captain would inform us that he knew nothing new.

Three hours later, the storm which had grounded us had come and gone, lightly misting the area.

After hour four, the captain announced our flight was canceled and we would return to the airport.

Because almost all other flights were canceled we again had to wait before exiting the craft.

So for the amount of time it takes to fly from New York City to Las Vegas — five hours — we sat on a grounded airplane.

I won’t go on about how my fiancée and I slept at the airport in a fort I made from our luggage because all the inns within 25 miles were full, or about the passenger who yelled at an attendant for 25 minutes while trying to get another flight out of New York, or how I had no clean clothes left and wore the same clothes for almost two days.

It was, bar none, the most miserable travel experience of my life.

This 27 hours of air travel hell got me thinking about the sad state of the airline industry and how the solution to all its problems is going to hit air travelers right in the wallet.

Ticket prices are fast on the rise as the airlines try to pass on the soaring cost of jet fuel to passengers.

But airlines are not looking only at raising ticket prices. There also are the fees.

When was the last time you tried to purchase a plane ticket over the phone?

Airlines are charging extra fees for folks who buy over the phone. Those fees are not applied if you purchase your ticket on the Internet.

Now, most U.S. airlines are charging $25 for checking a second bag and some airlines are charging up to a $100 more for the third bag checked.

U.S. Airways has joined American and United airlines — the nation’s two largest carriers — in charging a $15 fee for the first bag passengers check.

Some airlines are charging passengers more for aisle and window seats.

U.S. Airways is also planning on charging $2 for nonalcoholic drinks.

I wonder whether there is going to be anything left for flight attendants to serve besides bills.

And experts say more fees are probably on the way. There are some crazy ideas being tossed around. There has been talk in the airline industry of charging overweight folks more.

I wonder whether airlines have considered an education fee as we watch flight attendants teach us how to buckle a seat belt?

I wonder what the fee will be for salted peanuts and whether unsalted nuts will be cheaper.

When I finally did get on my flight to return to Nevada, I was tired and grumpy and had a brief exchange with a flight attendant.

I asked for a pillow and a blanket so I could try and sleep on the flight.

I was told none were available for me or anyone else on the plane.

A small amenity not being available was not what I was hoping to hear from the flight attendant, but I suppose it’s the response we should all expect from now on.

If you have a question, tip or tirade, call the Road Warrior at 387-2904, or e-mail him at roadwarrior@reviewjournal.com or fmccabe@reviewjournal.com. Please include your phone number.