Piff the Magic Dragon: Mr. Piffles’ Las Vegas pals
July 15, 2016 - 12:20 pm
Editor’s Note: While Robin Leach is on his annual family vacation in Italy, several of his showbiz pals have stepped forward to submit guest columns while he enjoys the treasures of Tuscany.
On Wednesday, we welcomed AMERICA’S GOT TALENT winners Terry Fator and Mat Franco and on Thursday the third winner and current Strip headliner Paul Zerdin with his ventriloquist show at Planet Hollywood.
No previous TV show in history has ever produced so many new stars to claim their place in the Las Vegas firmament. Today is AGT runner-up Piff the Magic Dragon, who landed his own wacky comedy magic show at X theater in the Flamingo. Here with Piff is his Chihuahua sidekick, Mr. Piffles. Woof, woof!
By Piff the Magic Dragon
Hello. Or should I say, “Woof?” Mr. Piffles here, the World’s First Magic Performing Chihuahua and now resident of Nevada USA, where I appear with my colleague and associate, Piff the Magic Dragon, at the Fabulous Flamingo.
Piff has asked me to compile a list of my favorite co-stars in Las Vegas, and even though I’m currently attempting to sleep 25 hours a day, apparently we’ve got tickets to sell. Therefore, needs must be met. In the last few minutes, I’ve learned to type and form sentences, so let’s crack get crackin’.
Elsie the African Spotted Pigmy Elephant (assisted by Penn & Teller)
Penn & Teller have been great friends to my Magical Dragon owner and even better friends to this rare genus of prestidigitating proboscides. Perhaps they have a thing for mythical beasts? Elsie stars nightly in the Penn & Teller show at The Rio, but the true magic happens at her daytime residence, The Secret Pasture of Penn & Teller.
If you’re lucky enough to gain entry, you’ll watch these marvelous creatures graze and frolic from the rustic comfort of The Secret Pasture Scenic Hay Ride as you explore, learn and play in an enchanting world of the rare and exotic African Spotted Pigmy Elephant.
On his rare mornings off, Teller can be found raising calves from birth and whispering Latin into their endangered ears as he gathers milks for a full range of African Spotted Pigmy Elephant unpasteurized yogurts, cheeses and chocolates. (Please note: Manufactured on equipment that processes products containing peanuts).
Just remember, The Secret Pasture of Penn & Teller does not exist.
Col. Sanders the Guinea Pig (assisted by Mac King)
Sanders, much like his political namesake, has some rather brutal war stories from his recent past. If you haven’t yet seen Mac’s show at Harrah’s, let’s just say that the colonel is rather aptly named for the magical journey he goes on twice a day.
Whilst historically I have had a difficult relationship with guinea pigs ever since one tried to take my job (http://bit.ly/GuineaPigHeist), I’ll make an exception for the colonel, who has fought his way up from the bottom – and still does daily.
Webster the Duck (assisted by David Copperfield)
Webster the Duck has been performing with David Copperfield for more than 30 years now. Like D.C. himself, he has aged well. As a fellow resident of Las Vegas, Webster, at MGM Grand, and I used to brunch together every third Sunday of the month.
Sadly, this came to an end over an ugly incident involving bread. But I’m not one to hold grudges, and it would be churlish to exclude Webster from his rightful place on this list.
Notable past performers: Shania Twain’s Horse
I would like to make a public apology here to Ms. Twain. She very kindly invited The Magic Dragon and me to her glorious show at The Colosseum a few years back. I was having the time of my life, singing along with every song, until “Still the One,” when that foul foal trotted out onstage. I’m sorry to admit that I lost it. The crowd turned on me, and I was evicted for excessive barking. What can I say? Horses creep me out. They are like mice to elephants.