‘Wahlburgers’: Why Mark and Donnie Wahlberg are better siblings than you
Sure, you SAY you love your sibling.
But, by co-starring on “Wahlburgers” (10:30 p.m. Wednesday, A&E), the new reality series about their brother Paul’s restaurant, Mark and Donnie Wahlberg — or, as they’re known on the show, Mahk and Dawnnie — may have set new standards for brotherly love.
Mahk also uses the series to showcase longtime friends John Alves, the inspiration for “Entourage’s” Johnny Drama, and Nacho, aka The Human Dumpster. But most of the brothers’ generosity is reserved for Paul.
Here are eight reasons why they’re better siblings than you:
1) Mahk is a busy guy. In addition to acting and working behind the scenes on his own projects, he produces the likes of “Boardwalk Empire” and “Prisoners.” He’s even trying to get a “Highway to Heaven” remake off the ground. Yet he still makes time to participate in a contrived, cross-country spaghetti sauce challenge between Paul and their mother, Alma.
2) Dawnnie is plenty busy himself, starring on your parents’ favorite show, “Blue Bloods.” But there he is playing along with their anti-Smothers Brothers “Mom likes me best” shtick.
3) Mahk clearly wants Paul to be more successful than Paul does. While Paul just wants to add a second location near Fenway Park, Mahk pushes global franchises from Las Vegas to Dubai.
4) Dawnnie: “Running a restaurant is like producing 10 movies at once.”
5) Mahk: “(Paul’s) the one that I always say is the most talented in the family.”
6) Dawnnie’s around more than Mahk, so he’s shown griping about his burger of the month. First because it’s not a permanent offering, then because of its name: the Donnie Double D. “I like boobs as much as the next guy,” he complains, “but I don’t want it to be the name of my hamburger.”
7) Dawnnie proves the first half of that statement by showing up in episode two with his new girlfriend, Jenny McCarthy. And even then, if you believe “Wahlburgers,” he’s willing to have his mother and girlfriend meet for the first time on camera.
8) Two-time Oscar nominee Mahk is doing all this on A&E, the home of “Duck Dynasty,” “Storage Wars” and “American Hoggers.”
