Nevada’s economic development milkshake brings all the boys to the state

CARSON CITY — Well, who saw this coming? (Answer: Everybody!)

Now that the entire Nevada Legislature has torn itself away from the primary purpose of the Nevada Legislature (running for re-election to the Nevada Legislature) to come to Carson City to pass a gigantic incentive package for Tesla Motors, it turns out other businesses may want one, too!

That includes existing businesses that are already up and running in Nevada, but which are thinking about expanding. Hello, Switch Communications! The high-tech marvel that has been the subject of many a Southern Nevada politician’s economic development boasts is apparently thinking of expanding in the South and the North, and it wants to get some of them Tesla bucks!

And why not? Why wouldn’t every company now thinking of setting up shop in Nevada — from the largest manufacturing operation to the newest Weinerschnitzel franchise — not ask for a little something from Nevada for the privilege of doing so? The old model of taking a risk, making an investment, paying your taxes and sinking or swimming based upon your market appeal? That’s so yesterday. This is the new economy.

One political guru of my acquaintance put it succinctly: It’s not that the state is doing this for Tesla that’s really the issue. It’s that the state can do this at all that’s the issue.

And now the question becomes, why not give Switch a deal? On what rational basis will the state say “yes” to Apple Computer or Tesla, but “no” to Switch? The number of jobs? How many is enough? The amount of total capital investment? What’s the threshold: $1 billion? $10 billion. (That lets out every Weinerschnitzel franchise except the one by my house.) The nature of the business? (Renewable energy, unmanned aerial vehicles and logistics, good, but new casinos, not so good?) The return on investment? What exactly will the rules be here?

And yes, I realize it’s the language of the Nevada Constitution, but does anybody else think in the present context the language of the governor’s proclamation — (“the governor may, on extraordinary occasions, convene the Legislature by proclamation,” and “…believing that an extraordinary occasion now exists, requiring immediate action by the Legislature…”) (emphasis added) — is more than a little ironic? This is the extraordinary occasion that interrupts campaigns and brings the center of the political universe back to Carson City posthaste?

Yes, I’m cynical. But I am also practical. That’s why today, I’m pleased to announce that I have decided to revive an abandoned idea for a superconducting super collider project, only this time in Southern Nevada. It’s going to bring lots of jobs and interesting research to the state. We will try our super-hardest not to find out if Stephen Hawking is right about that whole, destabilizing the Higgs bosun particle with high-energy fields and unraveling the fabric of space-time thing.

Incentives, please!