Adam’s Place provides children with a safe space to grieve

Finding a way to regain spirit can be difficult if grief is left to fester.

Behind closed doors at Adam’s Place Center for Grieving Children and Families, 5017 Alta Drive, children 3 to 18 and their families can deal with sudden deaths in their lives.

It’s a safe place to share the most painful of memories.

In its first year, Adam’s Place has helped more than 150 children cope with grief, partnered with Clark County School District guidance counselors, moved from shared space in a school to its own modest home and beco me a unique valleywide resource educating and encouraging discussions about how to pick up the pieces when tragedy strikes.

This was all done despite a challenging economy that has devastated clients and their families financially, physically and emotionally. Many of the families that use the center’s services are dealing with suicides because of the economic downturn.

A year ago, Kayla Falls couldn’t talk about losing her father, Ryan. He died suddenly from a massive heart attack shortly after Father’s Day. Kayla has attended sessions regularly at Adam’s Place since then and said the center has helped ease her pain.

"I remember when I just first started going," the 13-year-old said. "People would say little things that would make me go in tears. Going through (the program) almost a year now, when someone says something, I can think about my dad and I won’t break out in tears. I can think of the happy moments."

Kayla said she appreciates the program’s facilitators for understanding that everyone deals with loss differently.

"I feel so safe to talk about my dad," she said. "I feel very comfortable. I can be open, and I know no one will hurt me because I’m being open."

Kayla’s mother, Jenifer , said she turned to the center after trying to learn about grief on her own following the death of her husband of 15 years. It was too much to handle.

"This is a support group," Jenifer Falls said. "This is the club we all need to be a part of, but none of us want to be a member of it. We have all walks of life coming in these doors all for different reasons. Sometimes, in loss, people think if they’ve had a certain type of loss they won’t fit in, but this is for everyone."

She and Kayla have strengthened their mother-daughter bond in the process.

"There are no words to describe the changes in both of us," Jenifer Falls said. "We’re both mourning in our own way. At the first few meetings, she didn’t talk. Now, she tells stories about her dad. And we’re doing this together. I’ve learned patience and to just let her be."

Clients must attend an orientation meeting before they can regularly attend the biweekly program. Volunteers undergo background checks and also are trained to listen to children deal with grief. The center’s services are free, but donations are accepted.

The demand is great, founder Kelly Thomas-Boyers said.

"This cuts across all human common denominators," she said. "This brings together people with similar experiences, and through some education, they can learn how to help each other cope."

But it isn’t counseling. Trained facilitators lead group sessions in discussion. Those who give their time are dealing with their own losses, too — the brothers, sisters, cousins and parents who died unexpectedly.

Thomas-Boyers can relate to those she wants to help. Her son, Adam, died in a car accident in 2007. The 21-year-old wasn’t wearing his seat belt. There weren’t many resources available, so she made her own place to grieve and help others cope with their losses, too.

Eventually, the program will partner with police agencies, teachers, doctors, nurses and elsewhere, Thomas-Boyers added. She’s learned a lot in the past year. The program has overcome its fair share of struggles. Finding funding was a challenge, but grants, donations and other private resources have helped handle costs.

Sometimes people aren’t cut out to be facilitators, sharing too much about their own personal experiences rather than helping others grieve, Thomas-Boyers said. In that case, people have been given other responsibilities to help the cause.

Dazil Sampson wants to see Adam’s Place become a global endeavor. The 14-year-old lost his dad, Todd, to a heart attack last year.

"Right after my dad passed away I was angry, frustrated and irritated," Sampson said. "I was mad at my dad for passing away. I didn’t understand why, and it happened so fast. After going (to Adam’s Place), I’m not angry anymore.

"(The sessions) always start off a little rough. The thought of talking about your loved one makes it weird at first, but then you get more comfortable. After that, it’s really nice."

Contact Downtown and North Las Vegas View reporter Kristi Jourdan at kjourdan@viewnews.com or 383-0492.