Your cheetah checklist: ‘Counselor’ full of over-the-top scenes

By CHRISTOPHER LAWRENCE LAS VEGAS REVIEW-JOURNAL

11 years ago

Cameron Diaz as Malkina, uses Penelope Cruz as Laura, to glean some invaluable information that may have dire consequences, in “The Counselor.” (COURTESY/TWENTIETH CENTURY FOX)

There’s plenty to stare and shake your head at in “The Counselor,” the sexually charged, love-it-or-loathe-it crime drama from Cormac McCarthy and director Ridley Scott that stars Michael Fassbender, Javier Bardem, Cameron Diaz, Penelope Cruz and Brad Pitt.

Many of them, though, involve Diaz’s sociopathic Malkina.

Here’s a look at five of the craziest things — and there are many, many more to choose from — about her over-the-top character, Malkina:

1) She looks like Ellen Barkin by way of “The Hunger Games’ ” Effie Trinket.

2) She has two pet cheetahs.

3) She has Cheetah print tattoos hither and yon. Some on her hither, even more on her yon.

4) She tries to seduce a priest — or maybe she just wants him to talk dirty to her — in a confessional.

5) She sexually assaults a Ferrari. It’s one of the most memorably gratuitous scenes of the year, and it’s guaranteed to ensure you never look at Diaz, or a Ferrari, the same.